Men and Women Can’t be ‘Just Friends’
By Adrian F. Ward | Scientific American – Tue, Oct 23, 2012
http://news.yahoo.com/men-women-cant-just-friends-140000101.html
Can heterosexual men and women ever be “just friends”? Few other questions have provoked debates as intense, family dinners as awkward, literature as lurid, or movies as memorable. Still, the question remains unanswered.
Daily experience suggests that non-romantic friendships between males and females are not only possible, but common—men and women live, work, and play side-by-side, and generally seem to be able to avoid spontaneously sleeping together. However, the possibility remains that this apparently platonic coexistence is merely a façade, an elaborate dance covering up countless sexual impulses bubbling just beneath the surface.
New research suggests that there may be some truth to this possibility—that we may think we’re capable of being “just friends” with members of the opposite sex, but the opportunity (or perceived opportunity) for “romance” is often lurking just around the corner, waiting to pounce at the most inopportune moment.
In order to investigate the viability of truly platonic opposite-sex friendships—a topic that has been explored more on the silver screen than in the science lab—researchers brought 88 pairs of undergraduate opposite-sex friends into…a science lab. Privacy was paramount—for example, imagine the fallout if two friends learned that one—and only one—had unspoken romantic feelings for the other throughout their relationship.
In order to ensure honest responses, the researchers not only followed standard protocols regarding anonymity and confidentiality, but also required both friends to agree—verbally, and in front of each other—to refrain from discussing the study, even after they had left the testing facility. These friendship pairs were then separated, and each member of each pair was asked a series of questions related to his or her romantic feelings (or lack thereof) toward the friend with whom they were taking the study.
The results suggest large gender differences in how men and women experience opposite-sex friendships. Men were much more attracted to their female friends than vice versa. Men were also more likely than women to think that their opposite-sex friends were attracted to them—a clearly misguided belief. In fact, men’s estimates of how attractive they were to their female friends had virtually nothing to do with how these women actually felt, and almost everything to do with how the men themselves felt—basically, males assumed that any romantic attraction they experienced was mutual, and were blind to the actual level of romantic interest felt by their female friends. Women, too, were blind to the mindset of their opposite-sex friends; because females generally were not attracted to their male friends, they assumed that this lack of attraction was mutual. As a result, men consistently overestimated the level of attraction felt by their female friends and women consistently underestimated the level of attraction felt by their male friends.
Men were also more willing to act on this mistakenly perceived mutual attraction. Both men and women were equally attracted to romantically involved opposite-sex friends and those who were single; “hot” friends were hot and “not” friends were not, regardless of their relationship status. However, men and women differed in the extent to which they saw attached friends as potential romantic partners. Although men were equally as likely to desire “romantic dates” with “taken” friends as with single ones, women were sensitive to their male friends’ relationship status and uninterested in pursuing those who were already involved with someone else.
These results suggest that men, relative to women, have a particularly hard time being “just friends.” What makes these results particularly interesting is that they were found within particular friendships (remember, each participant was only asked about the specific, platonic, friend with whom they entered the lab). This is not just a bit of confirmation for stereotypes about sex-hungry males and naïve females; it is direct proof that two people can experience the exact same relationship in radically different ways. Men seem to see myriad opportunities for romance in their supposedly platonic opposite-sex friendships. The women in these friendships, however, seem to have a completely different orientation—one that is actually platonic.
To the outside observer, it seems clear that these vastly different views about the potential for romance in opposite-sex friendships could cause serious complications—and people within opposite-sex relationships agree. In a follow-up study, 249 adults (many of whom were married) were asked to list the positive and negative aspects of being friends with a specific member of the opposite sex. Variables related to romantic attraction (e.g., “our relationship could lead to romantic feelings”) were five times more likely to be listed as negative aspects of the friendship than as positive ones. However, the differences between men and women appeared here as well. Males were significantly more likely than females to list romantic attraction as a benefit of opposite-sex friendships, and this discrepancy increased as men aged—males on the younger end of the spectrum were four times more likely than females to report romantic attraction as a benefit of opposite-sex friendships, whereas those on the older end of the spectrum were ten times more likely to do the same.
Taken together, these studies suggest that men and women have vastly different views of what it means to be “just friends”—and that these differing views have the potential to lead to trouble. Although women seem to be genuine in their belief that opposite-sex friendships are platonic, men seem unable to turn off their desire for something more. And even though both genders agree overall that attraction between platonic friends is more negative than positive, males are less likely than females to hold this view.
So, can men and women be “just friends?” If we all thought like women, almost certainly. But if we all thought like men, we’d probably be facing a serious overpopulation crisis.
Are you a scientist who specializes in neuroscience, cognitive science, or psychology? And have you read a recent peer-reviewed paper that you would like to write about? Please send suggestions to Mind Matters editor Gareth Cook, a Pulitzer prize-winning journalist at the Boston Globe. He can be reached at garethideas AT gmail.com or Twitter @garethideas.
Follow Scientific American on Twitter @SciAm and @SciamBlogs. Visit ScientificAmerican.com for the latest in science, health and technology news.
© 2012 ScientificAmerican.com. All rights reserved.
The Science of the Soul and SoulMates: Does Science Support The Existence of BOTH?!
The Science of the Soul and SoulMates: Does Science Support The Existence of BOTH?!
Inboxx
http://www.scienceofsoulmates.com/The_Science_of_the_Soul.htm
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http://www.yogamag.net/archives/1979/isep79/pranicb.shtml
The DARK PLASMA THEORY in BIOLOGY:
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http://www.dapla.org/hef.htm
GEORGE NOORY’s “COAST 2 COAST AM” REINCARNATION SHOW ARCHIVES:
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http://www.coasttocoastam.com/shows/spirituality-occult
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http://www.coasttocoastam.com/show/2012/01/25
STRONGLY RECOMMENDED REINCARNATION WEB SITE:
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http://www.ufodigest.com/category/categories/paranormal/reincarnation
STRONGLY RECOMMENDED READING:
“The HOLOGRAPHIC UNIVERSE: The REVOLUTIONARY THEORY OF REALITY” – By
Michael Talbot [Paperback / Author]
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http://www.amazon.com/Holographic-Universe-Revolutionary-Theory-Reality/dp/0062014102/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1329730854&sr=8-1
——————————————
– Part #1 of 4 –
DEFINITION, PURPOSE and EVOLUTION OF THE “SOUL” or “SPIRIT”:
SOUL/SPIRIT CREATION:
Whether “The Central Spiritual Intelligence” ["The Prime Architect" or
"GOD"] and/or past bio-genetic manipulation by visiting “Ancient
Astronauts” ["Star Visitors"] in Earth’s distant past or
naturally-occurring evolution gave early man a “soul/spirit,” the early
primate stock was either artificially turned into or naturally became
Homo Sapien Sapiens.
As a result, a vessel or “container” was created into which Nature/God
was induced/invited to place a higher-consciousness “soul” which
represented an extension of itself [The Creator] so it could LEARN from
its new creations … HUMAN BEINGS which now possessed SENTIENCE that
separated it from all other living, NON-sentient life forms.
It is NOT exactly accurate to state that the soul/spirit is a
“by-product” of DNA, but rather that the fully-developed human body
inherently “draws into” itself a soul — or better stated — creates a
complex matrix within the human form/biological body which inherently
evokes/summons or calls forth the co-presence of an active, stimulating
consciousness which animates the new life form it now inhabits for a
lifetime.
Various lab experiments at creating lower-level life forms have affirmed
the principle that when all of the ingredients for life are properly
assembled that life will begin in earnest. Otherwise stated, life is
coterminous with the self-organizing principle which is inherently
embedded with the physical and environmental building blocks of life.
PREVIOUS INCARNATION SOUL MANIFESTATIONS
In many cases of reincarnation, the soul shares a strong resemblance in
their facial features in back-to-back incarnations. The soul projects an
“energy template” or hologram into the developing body and … the
physical body then shapes itself around it.
This includes intriguing cases and findings that if someone had a stab
or bullet wound in a PREVIOUS incarnation, they might have a birthmark
or scar in that SAME spot!
Related and similarly, the phenomenon of people speaking in a language
entirely unknown to them is called “XENOGLOSSY,” and has been present in
a number of cases where a past-life personality takes over the
consciousness of the current incarnation.
SOUL/SPIRIT EVOLUTION
A human being is a TWO-fold entity: part spirit and part physical. The
physical element [the biological body, "container" or "vessel"]
disintegrates at death.
HOWEVER, the spiritual part — generally viewed as the invisible,
duplicate and eternal part of humans — CONTINUES exactly as it was
before its present physical incarnation, only in another form of
existence as it lives on after the “death” of its physical body.
The spirit/soul carries with it ALL of the personality, character traits
and memories held and experienced during its physical life on Earth.
The soul/spirit is ETERNAL and after death will travel to either a good
or bad plane of existence depending upon the deeds in one’s most current
life.
The soul is comprised of intelligent, conscious energy. One’s Earthly
incarnation is just a short time in a very long, seemingly eternal
journey of the soul and will soon return to have MANY more different
lifetimes on Earth OR on other worlds as a “hybrid soul” in this
universe.
Once the incarnating entity ["soul"] finishes their journey on Earth and
experiences “death,” the soul travels HOME to the spiritual world or
“afterlife” ["Implicate Order" of the "Enfolded Universe" (multiple
dimensions) or "fine material world"], where it decides whether or not
it wants to come back into another lifetime on Earth — known as a
dense, harsh, suffering world — and WHEN as it may opt to travel to
“pleasure” or “recreational” worlds before returning.
LESSONS LEARNED FOR THE SOUL
It is known that removing oneself from a perfect home (the spiritual
world), and then being born/incarnated into the not-so-perfect Earth
plane allows the soul/spirit to grow spiritually.
The Earth is the LEARNING GROUND for the soul — pictured as a giant
classroom in school or a stage play that we act out over a lifetime –
where the soul experiences all of the delights and pleasures of being in
the physical world, learns the differences between good and evil and
repays KARMIC DEBTS in a “life script” it is given prior to its next
incarnation.
Missions, life lessons or purposes vary from soul to soul. Each and
EVERY SOUL has its own purpose that will will be fulfilled in due time;
your lessons are NOT your neighbors’, co-workers’, friends’ and family’s
lessons to be learned … NEVER compare your life lessons with anyone
else.
This purpose or mission is stated in the “soul contract” made in
consultation/agreement with one’s spirit guide and the Council of
Elders. Once a soul’s mission is fulfilled — its purpose is served –
and its lessons have become available, it leaves (“dies”) the earth
plane and returns to its former home — its TRUE HOME.
That acquired knowledge and experience the soul has just gained — and
shared/transmitted to the Central Spiritual Intelligence so that it too,
has learned from one of its creations — fulfills its contract or “life
script” for THIS incarnation.
CONSCIOUS AMNESIA
After “death,” the soul must be reminded of its true identity. Those who
have incarnated are living in a constant state of “conscious amnesia”;
they have forgotten who they really are, i.e., their “soul name.”
This is because when a person incarnates and animates a new life on
Earth, they agree to forget that they are a soul that has taken on a
body (“vessel” or “container”) to experience life in the physical world
or “Explicate Order” of the “UNfolded universe” (single dimension) also
known as the “coarse material world.”
Souls AGREE to this state of conscious amnesia because if people
remembered their real home, they would NOT want to live out their lives
HERE on Earth, fulfill the missions they came here to perform, or learn
the lessons they intended to perform or even perhaps seek out
retribution/vengeance on another incarnating soul who did them wrong in
another previous incarnation they had thereby distracting them from the
lessons they agreed to assume in their present incarnation.
NOTE: If a person (soul) who has just crossed over (died) had a
particularly, trying, violent or serious lifetime illness, they are put
into a “soul sleep” sometimes also referred to as “cocooning.”
The DESTINATION OF DISPLACED SOULS DUE TO EVIL ACTS WHILE ON EARTH
HOWEVER, if the life of the incoming soul/bioplasmic entity “died” due
to UNnatural causes which it initiated — suicide, homicide/murder (it
started), suicide bomber, and other various, assorted EVIL ACTS — and
therefore the essence of that soul is severely damaged, then spirit
guides move in quickly, and deliberately remove these maladapted,
DISPLACED SOULS for an indeterminate amount of time due to the negative,
serious effects they would have on other incarnated souls.
There are two (2) types of DISPLACED SOULS: 1) Those who refuse to
accept their “death” and move on to the “afterlife” abode where they
become known as “ghosts” or “demonic spirits” on Earth and 2) those who
willingly pass over to “the other side” who then undergo separation
protocols by their guides for their evil acts from all other incoming
spirits.
This impulse of theirs to harm other souls on Earth where they caused
extreme suffering results in NOT transmuting the same travel routes as
others souls do and instead they are directed into seclusion as
instructed by their spirit guides.
This spiritual irregularity and deviation from the normal exodus of
souls from Earth is necessary so they won’t mix with other entities for
quite some time while they are remanded to individual spiritual
isolation in order to intensify their learning/counseling under close
supervision by their teacher-guides.
Maladjusted spirits are NOT allowed to reincarnate again until their
seclusion and reindoctrination is deemed consistent with their being a
suitable candidate for another lifetime of experiences in the physical
world.
There is NO residence of terrible suffering ["Hell"] for souls, except
on Earth. ALL souls go to one (1) spirit world where everyone is treated
with patience, love understanding and compassion.
There IS a difference between wrongdoing with NO premeditated desire to
hurt someone and INTENTIONAL EVIL. The degrees of harm done to others
from mischief to purposeful malevolence are carefully evaluated by
teacher-guides. Those souls associated with extreme evil are taken to
special spiritual centers some call “intensive care units.”
These are centers of healing and rejuvenation in the spirit world, and
these therapeutic areas are AWAY from the general soul population for
intense directed therapy by teacher-guides.
If rehabilitation fails, these particular souls may spend a very long
time in a solitary spiritual existence, quite possibly over a 1,000+
Earth years. This is NOT considered “punishment” or even penance as much
as an opportunity for KARMIC GROWTH. There is NO “hell” for souls …
except perhaps on Earth. This is an earthly misguided construct with NO
factual basis to support it.
At some point, if it’s decided that they canNOT be returned to Earth,
then they are returned to “The SOURCE” (or “God”)
where their energy is REmodeled to make it whole again while still
retaining the core essence of traits that comprised that former sentient
being. SOUL ENERGY canNOT be destroyed, but it CAN be REshaped and
purified of earthly contaminants.
The price we pay for our MISdeeds and the rewards received for GOOD
CONDUCT revolve around the laws of KARMA. Perpetrators of harm to others
will do penance by setting themselves up as future victims in a KARMIC
CYCLE of justice. Our future destiny is influenced by a past from which
we canNOT escape, especially when we injure others.
The Bhagavad Gita, an early Eastern 700-verse Hindu scripture circa 200
BCE – 200 CE (or AD), has a passage which states: “Souls of EVIL
influence must redeem their VIRTUE.”
——————————————
– Part #2 of 4 –
The SCIENCE OF THE SOUL [BIOPLASMIC BODY]
Religious Terms: SOUL / SPIRIT
New Age Terms: PRANIC BODY / ETHERIC BODY /SOUL SPARK / SPIRITUAL BODY
Standard Terms: SHADOW MATTER / SUBTLE BODY
Scientific Terms: BIOPLASMIC BODY / DARK PLASMA MAGNETIC FIELD
Semyon Kirlian discovered a type of energy structure infusing and
surrounding the body of all living things in 1939 in Russia, after
noticing its appearance around patients while undergoing
electro-therapy. Kirlian and his wife then spent the next 25 years
developing the technology with which to study this energy structure.
Using Kirlian technology biophysicists and biochemists were then able to
study this energy structure using an electron microscope. In 1968
scientists in Russia officially announced the discovery of a new energy
system in all living things. Biochemists say that this energy body is,
“some sort of elementary plasma-like constellation made of ionized
particles … not a chaotic system, but a whole unified organism in
itself.”
The scientists studying this energy body called it “BIO-PLASMA ENERGY.”
It was further discovered, under closer examination, that this
bio-plasma body had certain points of intense energy that corresponded
exactly to the 700 main points of the ancient Chinese acupuncture chart.
Due to developments from the Kirlians’ bio-plasma technology, electronic
aids to accurately mark acupuncture points are being used by medical
laboratories around the world to treat patients. This is hard evidence
that the existence of the bio-plasma body is real and that it is
intimately related to our physical body.
WHAT DOES THIS BIO-PLASMA BODY LOOK LIKE?
“Every living thing placed in the high-frequency discharge produces
these patterns. A whole hand can look like the Milky Way, sparking and
twinkling against a glowing background of gold and blue. A freshly
picked leaf shines with an internal light that streams out through its
pores in beams that gradually flick out one by one as it dies. Leaves
taken from the plants of the same species show similar jewelled
patterns, but if one of the plants is diseased, the pattern in its leaf
is entirely different. Similarly the pattern produced by the same
fingertip changes with the mood and health of the man to whom it
belongs.”
A pattern can have an intrinsic meaning that is more profound than just
its appearance. Kirlian also thought about a deeper meaning attached to
the BIO-PLASMIC patterns:
“In living things, we see the signals of the inner state of the organism
reflected in the brightness, dimness and colour of the flares. The inner
life activities of the human being are written in these ‘light’
hieroglyphs. We’ve created an apparatus to write the hieroglyphs, but to
read them, were going to need help.”
The discovery of the BIO-PLASMA BODY was nothing new to mystics and
psychics; they had always known of its existence and some can even see
it. They call it the “AURA.” Cambridge biologist Oscar Bagnell designed
special hollow lenses filled with coloured dye that sensitised his eyes
and enabled him to view the aura first hand.
His description of the human aura is like those describing the
bio-plasma body seen using the Kirlian technology. Bagnell describes the
aura as being composed of a hazy outer layer and a brighter inner layer,
in which there seems to be striations running out at right angles from
the skin, Bagnell and other aura watchers say that every once in a while
a much brighter ray “reaches out from the aura like a searchlight” and
extends several feet from the body before vanishing again.
The BIO-PLASMA BODY has been observed as ‘a whole unified organism in
itself’, and just as the human biological organism has a brain and
nervous system that produces consciousness, it stands to reason that the
bio-plasma organism would have a corresponding structure that would
produce consciousness.
As its correspondence with acupuncture has shown, the BIO-PLASMA BODY is
connected with, and an EXTENSION OF THE BIOLOGICAL BODY; and again it
stands to reason that there must be something in the bio-plasma body
that has to do with the brain and nervous system of the biological body.
The bio-plasma body, in short, should contain some extension or
alternative plane of consciousness to the brain.
Our brains form neuronal patterns from our experience. In a similar way
it is likely that our bio-plasma ‘brain’ would also form patterns from
our experience. Biochemists describe the bio-plasma as an organised
constellation, so we can see that the concept of pattern-formation fits
neatly into the bio-plasma.
The BIO-PLASMA “BRAIN” IS WHAT WE CALL THE “SOUL”
Since the brain is quite capable of recording our experience and
permitting analytical thought, it follows that the soul would exist for
other purposes. Since the soul must have a purpose it could be that the
soul records the essence of experience and therefore the essence of
personality.
On our journey through life we will go through life-altering and
profound realisations. If we think of our own life, and others we know,
we may recall the milestones or turning points that have come from the
lessons of life. These climaxes are things a soul would want to keep on
its journey through its many lifetimes.
These climaxes are NOT simply memories (neuronal-brain structures), but
are paradigms of consciousness, that is, a new way of seeing, a new way
of being, a new plane of awareness, and an evolution of consciousness.
A PARADIGM is a new pattern or model. So we gain a NEW perceptual and
conceptual model to base our experience on, and a new pattern of self is
recorded in the bio-plasma as a memory of the soul.
In times of mystical awareness, transcendent states, or higher
consciousness, our consciousness would likely be operating through the
soul. When we elevate our awareness to the soul we would experience true
‘knowing’ of self (our larger, many lifetimes, ancient self); hence the
phrase from a Gnostic text that says: you have within you, everlasting
life, examine yourself, so you may live.
If we ascend to our soul, the self we realise and become is the self
that never dies, because this is the self that is reincarnated. The
stages achieved toward our power of awareness (our evolving soul) would
need to be ‘saved’ through reincarnation. In our lifetimes we would
always partly be living through our soul, so a part of us would never
die, but our destiny would be to become, as much as possible, our
eternal self.
The SOUL: The container of the essence of a person’s nature and the
vehicle for the eternal self.
——————————————
http://www.scienceofsoulmates.com/reincarnation.htm
– Part #3 of 4 –
The SCIENCE and PROOF OF REINCARNATION [TRANSMIGRATION OF THE SOUL /
METEMPSYCHOSIS]
New Age Term: REINCARNATION
Standard Term: The TRANSMIGRATION OF THE SOUL
Scientific Term: METEMPSYCHOSIS
METEMPSYCHOSIS: From the Greek term “Metempsychousthai” for “meta” = to
“animate” from “en+psyche” = soul = “to undergo or animate from the
soul”
The philosopher David Hume said, in his essay “Of the Immortality of the
Soul: ‘Metempsychosis’ [reincarnation] is … the only [survival] system
of this kind that philosophy can hearken to.”
/
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0872204022?ie=UTF8&tag=scienceofsoul-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=0872204022
“DIALOGUES CONCERNING NATURAL RELIGION: The POSTHUMOUS ESSAYS OF THE
IMMORTALITY OF THE SOUL and OF SUICIDE” – By David Hume [Paperback /
Author], Richard H. Popkin (Author)
Some philosophers, psychologists and thinkers admit that reincarnation
is a very sensible idea because it would answer so many questions and
problems about human existence.
The idea of reincarnation has existed for thousands of years. Hinduism,
Buddhism and New Age beliefs adhere to forms of reincarnation, but all
hold somewhat differing ideas to its purpose and its methods. Hinduism,
in short, believes in an eternal soul that accumulates karma during its
lifetime that eventually attracts the soul to another body, which may or
may not be human.
Buddhism is similar, except there is no eternal personal soul that is
reincarnated, but instead the energy force created by karma is that
which is reincarnated. The goal of Buddhism is to become free of the
illusion of self, which is part of the desire for life that creates
karma and therefore causes reincarnation.
Nirvana is total annihilation of the self to become the One at which
point there is an end to reincarnation and an extinction of personal
self. New Age beliefs are less dogmatic, but still have certain ideas
associated with reincarnation; sometimes much to do, it seems, with
personal taste.
If we look carefully we can find scientific evidence of the structures
that allow reincarnation to exist. And if we study these structures we
should be able to find exactly how reincarnation works and to therefore
know what will happen to us after we die.
REINCARNATION, or METEMPSYCHOSIS, is the transfer, or migration, of the
soul from one body to another body. To sustain the personal soul the
soul can only go to a body without a soul, that is, to an unborn human
child (note: human; not animal, because evolution of consciousness is an
ascension — humans have higher consciousness than animals, therefore
there is no point in going backwards).
As we saw in the Soul page, a human being has a BIO-PLASMA BODY, which
the evidence tells us must contain a structure of consciousness — the
soul. The soul has structured the bio-plasma by recording the essence of
a person’s life experience.
Because bio-plasma is a property of living matter an unborn child would
also have a bio-plasma, but would not yet have had any concrete
experiences that would form a soul structure in the bio-plasma. At a
certain stage the unborn human child, in short, does not yet have a
soul.
Therefore, when a person dies, their soul must be transmitted to an
unborn child, which then structures the bio-plasma of the child with the
bio-plasmic pattern of the dying person’s soul. The death and transfer
are part of the method of the evolution of consciousness.
Many mystics, such as Eileen Garrett, a well-known clairvoyant, have
seen spirals of energy leaving the dead body. However, although a
transfer of energy may also accompany reincarnation, we know that the
pattern of the soul has to be transmitted. In August 1986, Sydney
University’s scientific research team discovered a ‘low level’ energy
field.
The field was described as being possibly the Universal or Unified
Field, and was able to transmit energy patterns from one natural source
to another and produce a physical formation of those patterns.
The Science/Art Research Centre in Berri, South Australia confirmed this
when researchers there successfully replicated the experiment conducted
at Sydney University [Ref: Mark Balfour. Simply Living. Vol. 3, No. 10.
P.86.]. The soul, to transmit from one bio-plasma to another, needs to
transmit its pattern, so the discovery of this energy field reveals a
fundamental structure for reincarnation.
WHEN DOES A BABY RECEIVE ITS SOUL?
So, can we work out precisely at what moment the baby in the womb would
receive his or her soul? Apart from somehow viewing the foetus’s
bio-plasma with an electron microscope to look for some sort of rapid
pattern structuring, perhaps it is an indication that the soul has
arrived when the baby in the womb begins to dream.
There are many psychological and physiological theories for dreams, but
we still do not really know why we dream — this part of our life is
still a mystery. From the point of view of soul-to-brain interaction
dreaming could be a meeting ground of soul and everyday self, or
sometimes perhaps a plane of free play of the spirit, or of higher
learning, problem solving, or even precognition.
The psychologist Wilson Van Dusen thought that we could communicate with
our higher self at the edge of sleep, and in our dreams this
communication becomes symbolic and can tell us the truth about our
lives.
When we sleep we alternate between dream sleep (called paradoxical sleep
because brain wave emissions are almost the same as those we have while
awake) and deep sleep (or orthodox sleep). While awake our brain waves
are usually in the beta wave. In dreaming they slow to alpha wave. In
deep sleep they slow even more to the deep waves of delta.
Dreaming is less common in deep sleep, although it can occur. Most
subjects woken from deep delta sleep would say they weren’t dreaming,
and some say they were just thinking about something.
Occult investigator Colin Wilson wasn’t satisfied by the scientist’s
conviction that we only dream in the shallow alpha states.
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http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1906787093?ie=UTF8&tag=scienceofsoul-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=1906787093
“SUPER CONSCIOUSNESS: The QUEST FOR THE PEAK EXPERIENCE” – By Colin
Wilson [Paperback / Author]
He reasoned that since on the edge of sleep we experience dream-type
images, called hypnagogic visions, it is hard to see why they would just
shut off when we fall into deep delta sleep (our sleep patterns start
with deep delta sleep and then after about two hours surface into the
shallower alpha dream sleep [REM sleep] before plummeting again). In his
book, “Mysteries,” Wilson gives examples of dream prophecies, which he
suggests come to the dreamer while in deep delta sleep.
From my own experiences I am inclined to agree with Wilson. For about 12
months I experimented with what is called astral travel. When I
eventually succeeded in inducing this state it was clear to me that what
I had been practicing was to keep a small point of consciousness awake
as I plummeted into deep delta sleep.
Once in the depths of this state I found extreme consciousness and
feeling, I was able to go anywhere I wanted, to fly, but the most
important thing about this state was that I was in touch with the
higher, or even ultimate part of my being, and with the higher being of
existence.
The “music” or feeling of ultimate being was all around me, and I was
struck by the power of my awareness, as if in comparison the normal
waking state was a blurry, unfeeling existence. For me the lesson of
astral travel was that it revealed to me the possibility of higher
awareness and feeling, which I was later able to develop in my normal
awake state.
The point being made is that in our sleep, in our dreams, and in our
depths of being, we can make contact with our soul and the larger dream
of the Ultimate Beings.
If in the depths of deep sleep we are in contact with our source and our
eternal soul, then it seems reasonable to suppose that when the unborn
child shows indications of dreaming, at about the eighth month ["The
Secret Life of the Unborn Child," P.29.], the soul has arrived.
/
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0440505658?ie=UTF8&tag=scienceofsoul-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=0440505658
“The SECRET LIFE OF THE UNBORN CHILD: HOW YOU CAN PREPARE YOUR BABY FOR
A HAPPY, HEALTHY LIFE!” -
By Thomas Verny [Paperback / Author], John Kelly (Author)
How then does the soul “transmit,” or migrate, from one body to another?
Some eastern philosophies profess that the universe exists in a sea of
vital energy, and as the discoveries earlier mentioned attest, this sea
of energy has been uncovered using scientific equipment (such as
Milner’s energy patterns).
In the context of the Ultimate Beings this energy would be their being,
and although they have no consciousness they would have what could be
called an unconscious, or non-conscious mind. In simple poetic terms
they are forever asleep and the universe is their dream within which we
exist, but only we can be aware of the dream. Their dream is our
reality. Within the Ultimate Beings, within their unconscious minds,
this energy is their mindstuff.
The transmission of the soul in reincarnation would operate through this
all-pervading energy.
——————————————
http://www.scienceofsoulmates.com/evidence.htm
– Part #4 of 4 –
DO SOULMATES EXIST? The SECULAR VIEW
Soulmates are the result of a deep connection that develops between two
people because they have similar minds.
SPIRITUAL VIEW:
There is a design to the universe and soulmates are a necessary part of
the meaning and purpose of existence.
With the secular view, whether or not Soulmates are true, would depend
upon how lucky or persevering a person is in finding someone highly
compatible.
It does happen, but statistically, most people are not that lucky, or
not that patient. However there are ways of improving your chances of
finding your secular and spiritual soulmate.
The Science of Soulmates has exhaustively researched, using all
disciplines, for evidence for the design of the universe. The results
are that the only possible design or spiritual purpose to existence is
that Soulmates are the meaning and purpose of existence.
Simply put the theory is that the source of existence, what some people
call God, consists of two forces. These forces are male and female.
These two male and female energy fields have been discovered.
Human beings are the manifestation of these forces. Our role is to
awaken ourselves to our source. Our goal is to unite these forces in
awareness by finding our soulmate.
For a theory to be more than a fantasy there are many elements that need
to make sense. The kind of soulmate that exists in the meaning of
existence is a one and only soulmate.
This means you have one soulmate whom you journey through lifetimes
with. While you may have many partners, you only have one true soulmate,
who is searching for you, as you are searching for them.
See: “How To Find Our Soulmate”:
/
http://www.scienceofsoulmates.com/findsoulmates.htm
EVIDENCE FOR THE SOURCE OF SOULMATES
Scientific instruments recorded evidence of a fundamental energy pattern
that reveals the source of existence and the source of the phenomenon of
soulmates.
Dennis Milner and Edward Smart co-authored a book titled, The loom of
creation: A study of the purpose and the forces that weave the pattern
of existence, which contains many photographs of energy patterns that
exist everywhere in the universe, even in a vacuum.
/
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/006012976X?ie=UTF8&tag=scienceofsoul-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=006012976X
“The LOOM OF CREATION: A STUDY OF THE PURPOSE and THE FORCES THAT WEAVE
THE PATTERN OF EXISTENCE” -
By Dennis Milner [Hardcover / Author], Edward Smart (Author)
Many scientists say these energies are the fundamental force patterns
responsible for all existence. While the patterns are varied in their
appearance, there are notably two distinct types: “sphere-forming warmth
ether or the raying-out light ether.”
As Biologist Lyall Watson confirms, the patterns are of two distinct and
separate entities.
/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lyall_Watson
The fact that there are two energies underlying all of existence is
further evidence of the male and female forces responsible for
soulmates. [See: "Purpose for Soulmates" ABOVE]
A close look at these two energies reveals the latent essences of male
and female intrinsic within them. In the pattern (1 below), we see a
central core out of which force lines reach out in a kind of structured,
mathematical way.
In pattern (2 below on Web site), there is also a central core, but its
way of reaching out, or extending itself, is with other sperical,
core-like structures.
We can relate the first pattern (1), to the nature of Man, because from
the centre of his being Man reaches out into existence in a logical,
mechanistic, linear way.
There are many force lines radiating from the core of the pattern, just
as man’s nature involves many ‘structures’ to enable him to reach out
into existence and interrelate.
In societal Man, this is revealed in the way men need the aid of
activities in order to communicate, while women do not need these
ulterior diversions as much; a woman’s communication is more direct and
close.
This ability of women for intimacy, or closeness, can be related to the
other force pattern (2), where this entity’s way of reaching out into
existence is through extensions of its core with other core structures.
This reaching out with one’s core and receiving through one’s core
describes the intuition and feeling inherent in women in an uncannily
accurate and beautiful way.
We can see, in just this element of the pattern alone, the spiritual
origin of that part of Woman’s nature which is intuition: an ability to
feel what’s right because experience enters Woman directly, whereas Man
gleans his experience through a labyrinth of structures.
It is quite astounding to recognise that these simple patterns, when
looked at from the proper perspective, can reveal the complexities of
human nature laying latent in their structure.
AFTER THOUGHT….
The late and highly-acclaimed science fiction author ARTHUR C CLARKE
explained the four (4) stages of how scientists react to the development
of anything NEW of a REVOLUTIONARY nature:
1) “It’s NONsense!”
2) “It is NOT important!”
3) “I always said it was a GOOD idea!’ and …
4) “I thought of it FIRST!”
——————————————
Copyright © 2012 / The Science of SoulMates.com
Compiled, Researched and Written by VICTOR MARTINEZ at:
VictorGM@webtv.net
http://www.victorthewizard.info/
http://www.scienceofsoulmates.com/The_Science_of_the_Soul.htm
We Are All One by Janet Kira Lessin
We are all one, one consciousness, one awareness, GodSource incarnated in human form. We are as connected to one another, are as one as your nose, eyes, ears, tongue, feet, hands are to this body you now incarnate.
Internalize awareness of your connections to all of creation. When you remember who you are as a soul, you cannot possibly war against yourself.
Benjamin Fulford has a valuable message. There are elements in our world that wish to destroy most of what exists and has come before. This is the continuum maximizing potentiality as we approach 2012 and the new paradigm that looms before us.
Existence thrives on diversity. Diversity is maximized through this existing operating system of polarity. So as we reach the end of the yugas, the dark gets darker and the light lighter.
You, as always, are the Chooser. Chose where you wish to be along the continuum. This polarity defines you as a soul and you evolve and grow, learn and expand based on where you chose to experience life along the continuum between light and dark, good and evil.
Chose love and light always. Chose love. Learn how to embrace unconditional love for all beings, all existence. Set boundaries for your personal life and hang out with those who nurture, love and support you.
Do not support evil or unkind behavior in anyone. Nullity is the answer. Left alone to reflect those ostracized will naturally adjust their behavior in order to be included, to self socialize and be in oneness with all others who resonate in harmony.
Love, Blessings, Happy Holidays. Hold onto your hats as we countdown to 2012 and all the GOOD THINGS that await us.
You are God incarnate in flesh. Chose the matrix, the timeline, the paradigm, the multiverse which supports love and light and you’ll find yourself living that existence for yourself and all who love
Stop supporting that which no longer serves you or your loved ones. Nullity. Do not support banking systems, governments, individual politicians, people who support the 1%. Nullity is one of the major solutions and if we don’t show up for war, war’s not gonna happen. If we pull our money away from the corrupt bankers, the banks will no longer exist.
It’s easy to blame others but we are supporting this corrupt system every time we turn on a light or gas up our cars.
Drive less. Support local business. Grow food. Take in your homeless friends and family. Learn how to work together in tribe, in smaller groups. If you fight with your family members, go to therapy. Learn conscious commuication skills.
Educate yourself in kind ways of loving and living. Life each day fully, in appreciation of love, nature, beauty. Get out in nature. Plant a garden and put your hands and feet in the soil. Mother nature will ground you and pull you back into your body, into awareness of your oneness with the land, each other, all of creation.
We create this world. We are the masses. We create this reality, this world. There are now 7 billion of us. Support love everywhere you go. Smile.
Give hugs (where appropriate). Create hugging as a model, a paradigm for your family first. Then extend your family out to your community. Family is not simply those with who you are related to by blood. When you feel the apparant other, you heal individually and collectively.
We are all one soul family. We are all one being in creation and the illusion that we are separate is just that… an ILLUSION.
Stop participating in war. War is over, is now illegal. Stop warring with your families. Even small disputes and separation lead to global war. The microcosm reflects the macrocosm.
Smile. Stop, breathe, pay attention to that small voice within you and let yourself gain clarity before you speak. Come from love. Center within your heart (the torus, the toroid within each being that reflects the universal, quantum physics of existence).
Love truly is the answer. You are love incarnate. We are all love. We are oneness having a grand experience.
REPEAL DOMA by Senators Leahy & Coons (LET POLYS MARRY)
We chaired the first-ever congressional hearing focused on repealing the discriminatory Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), bringing us even closer to restoring the rights of all lawfully married couples to receive the full benefits of marriage under federal law.
Now, on the heels of our successful hearing, we’re rallying the American people to join the 145 congressional co-sponsors who are on the record in support of repealing DOMA, in an effort to win over the support of our colleagues who are still on the fence.
We respect marriage — for all Americans, including same-sex couples. Will you stand with us? [POLYS DEMAND THE RIGHT TO PLURAL MARRIAGE TOO. LET SENATORS LEAHY & COONS KNOW WE CLAIM THE RIGHT TO MARRY MORE THAN ONE - Sasha Lessin, Ph.D. www.worldpolyamoryassociation.com]
Click below to sign on as a Citizen Co-sponsor of our DOMA-repeal legislation at WeRespectMarriage.com.
We’ve got lots of momentum behind us. In fact, a majority of Americans — 53 percent — now believe same-sex couples deserve the same right to marry as everybody else.
So when the Obama administration announced it would no longer defend the discriminatory Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) in federal court earlier this year, we went a step further and co-sponsored the Respect for Marriage Act to completely repeal DOMA — which President Obama officially endorsed.
Then, just last month, this growing public acceptance — and the persistence of the pro-equality community — persuaded a bipartisan majority of legislators in New York to approve same-sex marriage legislation, after previously rejecting it.
Nevertheless, until we repeal DOMA, federal law will continue treating gays and lesbians unequally. That’s wrong — and we need to do something about it.
Justice delayed is justice denied, and for those lawfully wedded same-sex couples who have been denied the full federal recognition we both enjoy in our own marriages, the Respect for Marriage Act is long, long overdue.
That’s why — even if you’ve already contacted Congress or spoken out against DOMA — it would mean so much if we could publicly list your name as a Citizen Co-sponsor of our legislation to right this terrible wrong.
It’s often said that the wheels of justice grind slowly, but we’re teaming up to pick up the pace.
We hope you’ll join with us.
__._,_.___
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The 2011 World Polyamory Association Conference is July 29-31, 2011 at Harbin Hot Springs, N. CA. Join the choice movement. Attend one of our conferences, seminars or events to show your support for relationship freedom. www.worldpolyamoryassociation.com
Contribute. Network. Join our social network at www.sacredmatrix.ning.com.
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__,_._,___
Loving Thy Neighbor: I have SEX WITH THE COUPLE NEXT DOOR
Loving Thy Neighbor: I have SEX WITH THE COUPLE NEXT DOOR. Should I tell my kids about it? by Emily Yoffe prudence@slate.com. From Dear prudence: Advice on manners and morals in
Slate Magazine for June 23, 2011
Dear Prudie,
I am a widower in my mid-50s with three grown children and many grandchildren. My wife died 10 years ago, and three years ago I moved into a new house. I hit it off very quickly with my next door neighbors “Jack” and “Diane,” a married couple in their late 30s with a now-7-year-old son. Our relationship soon became sexual and we are a three-member “couple.” Their son, whom I love dearly, has his own bedroom at my house and calls me “Uncle.” The problem is my youngest son recently lost his job, is in terrible financial straits, and has asked if he, his wife, and two young children can move in with me! I haven’t told any of my children about my unconventional relationship. My wife and I had a happy marriage, and we raised our children in a normal, loving home. Yet when I met the couple I am with, everything seemed to flow so naturally that I didn’t give it a second thought until now. Turning away my son in his time of need isn’t an option, but breaking off my relationship isn’t an option either. Should I keep the whole thing under wraps while my son and his family are here? Jack and Diane think I should be upfront and tell my son, but then everyone would know about this. Most people wouldn’t understand, and frankly it would be humiliating!
Can’t Stop This Thing I Started
Dear Can’t,
Now that Big Love is off the air, I hope HBO considers the possibilities of a series called Uncle Bob, which tackles both polyamory and the burgeoning social trend of broke adult children returning home. Since you’re a loving father who won’t turn away his son, you lay out clearly your three options for how to proceed: put your threesome on ice; sneak around; come clean. But since you say you’re unwilling to temporarily retire from your trio, that’s out. And, frankly, your grown son’s financial debacle shouldn’t require you to put the kibosh on your romantic life, however odd. Sneaking around may seem like a possible solution, but consider how that’s going to work. Announcing, “I’ll be staying over the neighbors’ for a few nights so that all of you can have the house to yourselves!” is only going to raise suspicions, especially since little Jack Jr. has his own bedroom at your place. I’m afraid I agree with Jack and Diane: The best course is for you to tell your son. This means explaining that, unlikely as it may beand no one is more surprised about this than youyou are in a relationship with the couple next door. Obviously, say you aren’t going to go into the mechanics of this set-up, and you intend to protect his kids, as you are protecting the couple’s child, from the details of your intimacy. (I’m giving you the benefit of the doubt that you are.) Explain that you are only revealing this aspect of your personal life because privacy is going to be at a premium, but you hope he can discreetly accept your situation. Sure, it will be a shock, but ultimately news of your personal arrangements pales in comparison with being in financial freefall. How sly of you to choose Jack and Diane as pseudonyms for your friends. John “Cougar” Mellencamp may have sung about a similarly named pair: “Oh yeah life goes on/Long after the thrill of living is gone.” But your Jack and Diane have found that a once-lonely grandfather is the way to bring back the thrill.
Prudie
Learn more about polyamory, how to make it work win-win for all, meet and celebrate with potential new lovers: Harbin Hot Springs California POLYAMORY CONFERENCE July 29-30. 808 244-4103
http://www.schooloftantra.net/worldpolyamoryassociation/conferences/HarbinHotSprings2011/HarbinHotSprings2011
POLYAMORY INTERNET VIDEO: Ask_Dr_Helen/Threesomes,_Foursomes or_More!__Why_Multiple_Partners_Can_Be_Great with Janet Kira Lessin & Sasha Lessin, Ph. D.
Also http://drhelen.blogspot.com/2009/08/ask-dr-helen-on-pjtv-threesome.html
POLYAMORY: PATH TO ETERNAL MARRIAGE by Janet Kira Lessin
POLYAMORY: PATH TO ETERNAL MARRIAGE by Janet Kira Lessin
Does monogamy lead to divorce? Monogamy is conditional love full of requirements and restraints, pulling in reigns, restricting freedom, spontaneity and choice. But monogamy’s opposite, running wild, sewing oats, following every whim, seems to avoid intimacy. Intimacy takes time, connection and intensive sharing to be truly known, loved and accepted and give your lovers enough feedback to know themselves.
Unconditional love is a state of being, a feeling radiating from self towards another. If you set boundaries for self perservation and happiness, can you do so and still love unconditionally?
Polyamory, is the perfect middle path. Monogamy, polyamory, swinging, BDSM, fetish, gay, bi, lesbian, all paths have rules, regulations and ways of being, mindsets that lets souls open to love by recognizing human frailty, acknowledging it and loving despite it all
Yet love and involvement differ. Healthy individuals set firm psychological emotional and physical boundaries which show that they love themselves first and foremost and won’t tolerate abuse and disrespect.
Souls are naturally polyamorous. After life we remember our oneness and reunite with our soul mates, our soul family. We’ve shared and loved in every imaginable way. We’ve been male and female, mother, father, sister, brother, daughter, son, aunt, uncle, cousin, friend, boss, employee, husband, wife, lover, enemy to each other over and over, lifetime after lifetime, throughout eternity. We’re not only polyamorous, we’re also incestuous. And through this flow, mixing and matching, loving and hating and feeling all emotions humanly possible, we learn how to love totally, completely, unconditionally.
Since we came through the veil, assumed human form and forgot who we truly are, love feels more conditional. But somewhere in the middle of this co-created dream, some of us wake up and remember who we really are–soul mates. We are soul mates with many souls with whom we interact, share many lives and are deeply, interconnected. We also have a primary soul mate who is our twin flame, our split-apart, created at the same moment in time and is our other half (think of the yin/yang symbol). All our beloved soul mates are equally important. All are one with GodSource and us and each other.
Sometimes we meet and mate and sometimes we do not even incarnate together. Sometimes we incarnate at the same time and never meet. And sometimes we incarnate together and never do figure out how to get along. All decisions to interact, our path in life and destiny are pre-determined by us with the help of our friends, guides, council and our soul family. Within that formula for our lives are variables to the theme. So nothing is set in stone. We are at choice in every moment.
Egos, personalities are different than souls. Souls have eternal awareness of love and use physical incarnations as opportunities to learn lessons necessary for the evolution of our souls and for the progression of he entire human species and the evolution of consciousness for all beings in creation and in all the multi-verses.
Sometimes for some of the lessons we do not incarnate with any of our soul mates or our twin flame. Now that’s a rough life. But for the most part, we come together, some if not all of us, lifetime after lifetime.
Spiritual evolution is why we chose to incarnate and experience life in the first place. Remembering who we are, waking up in the dream and progressing as a soul to the point where we can find our soul mates and learn how to love unconditionally is the way to bring heaven to earth.
We are in actuality engaged in a form of eternal marriage in a group of souls with whom we mix and match in all possible combinations till we get it. Love IS. Form is inconsequential.
And yet, yes, in life we meet, mate, love, have sex, father, give birth, mother, experience it all, love, die, return after love, experience joy, hurt, pain and suffering and remember our oneness.
In death there is clarity of our true nature and interactions with all souls. There we realize the depth and complexity of our dance. Here we can learn how to remember by following our hearts.
Using polyamory coupled with maturity and learning how to navigate the waters and recognize eternal love, we can overcome the limitations of the ego, frailties of the human psyche and love our souls mates and include physical love if that so moves us.
I am eternally married to my soul mates. I have been blessed to meet and marry my twin flame, my primary soul mate and several of my soul mates. Individually and collectively Sasha and I have loved other soul mates and dear ones. We recognize that some of our individual soul mate connections apply to both of us. In other words, some of his soul mates are my soul mates and vice versa even though one of us may have felt a stronger connection to a soul mate than the other.
All are Beloveds whether or not our egos were capable of working out the dynamics and overcoming cultural conditioning and religious and family-of-origin programming. Despite it all and because of it all, we love, totally, completely, unconditionally.
Yet part of me longs to reunite with all my soul mates. Ideally the challenge is to do it here, on Earth, in physical form. That would be an epiphany, so cool, so groovy if Sasha and I could actually meet and marry our soul mates. It would be bliss if we could recognize, while incarnated in the flesh, that which exists eternally. Heaven on Earth. Now that would be enlightenment.
Maybe some future life. Perhaps soon with all the earth changes and economic collapse we’ll recognize what’s really important rather than going more and more unconscious and turning on one another like dogs fighting over a bone. Wouldn’t it be nice to go through life with dignity and grace and support each other through thick and thin, for better or worse, each committed in life to take feedback and correction and commit to our eternal family, and all its members with whom we are eternally married? Wouldn’t it be lovely if we would commit, that here, now, in this incarnation that we’re going to get the lessons we came here to learn and do it right?
In many ways we’re eternally married to all of us. But we operate under the rules of physicality which includes rules of time and limitations. So realistically, maybe all we can do is focus on our family, our circle of friends and beloveds. And maybe this time our soul family hasn’t chosen to all incarnate together. But then again, who knows?
Perhaps they have and this is all a test we’ve designed for ourselves to learn how to truly love. Ultimately it doesn’t matter one way or the other because eternally we’re one, we love all and everyone, in fact every thing. So like the 60s song, “If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with.”
Notice attractions. That’s your clue. Recognize those with whom you have strong bonds, karma, interactions, intensity, critical incidents, good or bad. That’s probably your soul family.
Make amends. Do charitable and corrective actions. Send love. If your loved ones are dead, talk to their spirits. They can hear you for they are now much wiser and have learned much.
I highly recommend that if you’re involved with someone and feel love and attractions towards another or others, negotiate a new contract with your beloved. Learn how to expand your horizon to include all your beloveds because as souls you’re doing it. You can do it here too. But it will take a lot of work, sometimes intense, extreme work to overcome your programming, face your fears, negativity and projections.
But if you do, you will grow exponentially. I know because that’s the path I’ve chosen. And while it may not have always been conscious, my soul, my ancient, wise soul guided my scared, wounded, Inner Child and human heart until now, I know the beauty of unconditional love. And I do love you all.
I will find my soul family, dead or alive, incarnate or in spirit, for I know we love one another eternally in an eternal marriage. For now, I write to you. I know we are forever connected and in the almost seven billion souls now incarnated, somehow some of us will find each other. I’m not sure if you’re male or female, young or old. But hopefully some of you are just the “right age” for sexual loving to be legal and that we choose to commit to follow our hearts. I pray we work out the dynamics of the ego to create a sacred marriage, a reflection of our eternal love of our hearts and souls, heaven made manifest on Earth.
Janet and her beloved Sasha run the World Polyamory Association with their partner, Dr. Dave Doleshal
This year’s conference is July 29-31, 2001.
www.worldpolyamoryassociation.com–
Janet Kira Lessin
1371 Malaihi Road, Maui, Hawaii 96793
janetlessin@gmail.com, janetlessin@aol.com
School of Tantra: www.schooloftantra.com, schooloftantra@aol.com
Temple of Tantra: www.templeoftantra.org, templeoftantra@gmail.com
Sacred Matrix: www.sacredmatrix.com, www.meetup.com/sacred-matrix, www.sacredmatrix.ning.com
808-244-4921 office, 808-214-3442 cell
I’M POLYAMOROUS by Janet Kira Lessin
I’M POLYAMOROUS by Janet Kira Lessin
This is my official declaration that I’m polyamorous. I’m polyamorous and I’m in
love with everyone. Yet I realize that love and involvement are two different
things, time is limited and relationships are complex, complicated and if
personalities don’t match, chaotic. So I must be selective.
I love myself, so I chose to be involved with those who’ll love and respect me.
I don’t always succeed in surrounding myself with those who treat me nice, so I
constantly fine-tune life adjusting those with whom I’ll permit in my personal
space. I’m learning about boundaries which I didn’t have for the most part in
the first half of my life due to abuse and programming.
Since my heart is huge and my chakras wide open, people project their disowned
selves on me and the good, bad and ugly, so I get a lot of drama and intense
emotions coming my way from others and elicited from my being. As a result, my
life is rich, intense and full. And complicated.
I’m a tantra teacher and psychotherapist specializing in relationship counseling
which creates a life so full of potentiality and possibility, I am in awe and at
the same time very busy.
My studies, therapy, internal processes, meditation, practice and self
reflection have led me to a state of samadhi, enlightenment. Yet as I write
those very words that I am enlightened (full of light), I judge myself and
attempt to censor my words and say to myself, “How can you be so vain?” And as I
criticize myself and call myself vain, Carly Simon’s song, “You’re So Vain”
plays in my head. Then I smile, laugh at myself for being human and I hear my
husband telling me, “Nothing in the human condition is alien to any of us.” I
realize the thoughts I think are probably thought by many of you. In the end I
decide to edit my words and now restate my revelation and say that I am
officially, “on the path.”
I realize I am enlightened in the aspect that I have obtained a state of grace,
an awareness and capacity to love each and every one of you totally, completely,
unconditionally. This state is a place we can all go to and eventually will get
to. From this level of awareness where we know we’re one, we’ll stop killing
each other, the animals, plants, environment, planet, water, land, air and
Earth. We’ll survive.
I woke up crying. Haven’t done that in years. It’s still dark. Only 5:30 AM.
I realize Jesus walked the world in this state of being in love with everyone
and everything. On one hand I’m not even sure of Jesus actually lived, was a
real person or just a mythical being, an archetype. On the other hand, I
remember an incarnation with Jesus. I was one of his wives and yes, he was
polyamorous. I died, pregnant, wasn’t able to give birth to his child. Once
again I want to censor my words. But I’ll just let them stand and reflect and
you can simply read them and digest, decide if they’re true or just judge that
Janet’s crazy or maybe on to something or on something or whatever. And that too
is ok because I’m in love with you. I’m in love with you all.
I wonder if this state of awareness will last. Will I still feel this way
tomorrow?
My husband, dearest beloved one is so poly and in his 70s, almost 71 now and
he’s actually made love with hundreds, maybe even thousands. Some still living.
Many dead. But he told me years ago, 13 in fact when we met, that he loved
everyone he ever loved and made love with. And while I believed him, I just
couldn’t quite fully grok it at the time. But I took it in and decided to open
up my then blossoming, just being birthed poly self and began to explore opening
up my body, mind, soul and being to more love.
It scared the crap out of my Inner Child. And it opened me up to more judgment,
rejection, projection and the worst of all, criticism. But I experienced,
reacted, reflected, rejected, wiped my tears, collected my pride, picked up the
remnants of my self esteem, did my therapy on it all, and amazingly emerged
relatively whole and unscathed despite it all.
Ironically, at a point where I’m currently living more monogamously than I have
in my 20 years of actively exploring polyamory, I am aware that I’m more
polyamorous philosophically, politically and spiritually than ever before.
A part of me is licking my wounds and feeling rejected. I’ve gained weight, I’m
aging and I can’t afford a face lift. I’m lazy, busy and can’t seem to get to
the gym. I’m stressed, too busy while at the same time in love, ecstatic and
blissed out. What a schism. Yes, that’s me, my life–complex.
So in the midst of such emotional turmoil and joy, I met yesterday with my
husband, a friend of five years and two new people and we all had the most
interesting conversation I’ve been blessed to be a part of in years. Reflecting
back on the moment in my dream state, I realized that I was in love with all
those people at the same time. We talked about the state of the world, 2012,
Earth changes, ETs, the environment and the fate of the polar bears.
In my dream I realized I was in love with my world and all beings. And in the
discussion it was said that polar bears are doomed because the ice caps are
dissolving. They’re going, gone, as witnessed in person by the two new people in
the group, fresh off the plane from Alaska. The glaciers are gone! Global
warming IS. And I want my polar bears to survive.
We talked about how humans destroy eco-systems. My friend of 5 years sits on
some planning commission boards here in Maui and they’re planning a development
and have authorized a system where they’ll inject toxins deep within the Earth’s
core to create energy, power for this new development. They have no idea what it
will do to the environment, but it will allow them to build this upscale housing
plan and golf course for the ultra rich.
BUT THEY DON’T REALLY KNOW WHAT THIS NEW ENERGY SYSTEM WHERE THEY INJECT TOXINS
IN TO THE EARTH WILL DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?????????????
But…. it solves their immediate problem so they can build this ultra deluxe,
super rich gated community.
And I think of the polar bears….. and the kodiak bears they’ve begun to mate
with. And the whales, and the fish, and the coral reef. And I’m in love with it
all. And I wake up crying. And my mind is screaming–I’m in love, I’m in love,
I’M IN LOVE!
We also spoke of extraterrestrials and making contact and the techno fixes they
might have for humanity. And I’m reminded of Jesus and always looking outside
myself for the savior to come down from the heavens and rescue us poor humans.
Then I think of the plight of the polar bears and humanity’s part in pollution
and poor choices that will probably lead to all our demise.
While we spoke of waters rising which are now being documented daily, the news
catches up with our conversation and less than 24 hours after being spoken,
thousands die from an earthquake and the subsequent tsunami created in Japan.
And Maui citizens were propelled from their low lying and ocean front homes and
tourist and resident alike spent a night of hell, island-wide warning sirens
blaring every hour till dawn. Maui was barely touched. But it sure was one heck
of a wake up call.
Earth changes, pole shifts, global warming, earthquakes, sinking shores, rising
tides, it’s all real. It’s happening. Planning commissions here (and most likely
elsewhere) still plan ocean front communities and resorts knowing full well
those places are going to be under water in very short order and many living
there will be killed.
So I wake up crying, saying, “I’m in love.” Yes I love you. And it dawns on
me that I am now truly 100% polyamorous, in love with you all, with it all, all
beings, planets, galaxies, good, bad, ugly–it ALL!
I realize every single one of us can wake up and remember, just like me, in the
twinkling of an eye like they say in the Bible. And in that precise moment, when
we wake up, the insanity stops. For if we’re in love with everyone, all beings,
all things, we will stop hurting, destroying and killing.
So yes, I’m Princess Leia and it’s my job to save the world. While the Death
Star (Nibiru, Planet X) is coming heralding the Earth Changes, 2012 and we’re
all going to die, in the midst of it all, I, we, all realize, we’re all in love.
Leia loves Han Solo, Luke Skywalker, Obiwan Kanobe, Yoda, C3PO, R2D2, Wookie and
Jabba the Hut and they love her. Even Darth Vader is Father, and he’s now good.
Trumpets blare and we all celebrate. In love with it all, all beings, the
galaxy, we love and preserve it all so we all have a place to live, love and
learn.
With the world saved since we now all love each other and the planet, we want
the best for all beings. Whew! Now I can focus on me.
Now that I love myself again, warts, wrinkles, weight and all, I can weigh my
options. Who will I have in my life and my bed?
I look down between my legs as I write in my journal and my new kitty purrs,
warming my soul. So my new lovers will have to love her, of course. And Sasha’s
my Soul Mate, Twin Flame and Primary. Through past-life and inter-life
regression therapy combined with tantra, we remember we’ve been together since
of dawn of time through hundreds of lifetimes. We like being partners, sharing
lives and lovers.
So any who love me will have to love Sasha for Sasha and I are such an integral
part of one another. He is in my consciousness every moment and I in his. We
take each other into consideration in all decisions as if we were one being with
two heads. Certainly our hearts are one. And we’re Siamese twins connected at
the soul.
And I love this land, this incredible jungle paradise and my funky house that
requires so much love, care, maintenance and hard work. So those who love us
must surely love our Maui hippy home and will also love to work, toil the soil,
fix, repair and co-create conscious, sustainable community, a vision of Heaven
on Earth.
We await you, dear beloveds. We know you are there. We love you already. We know
you care. Will you awaken and evolve, so we desire to be involved? Will you love
enough to create a consensus reality where all are loved and feel it to the core
of their being? Think about it. Let us know. In the meanwhile, I’m in love. I
love you. I love it all.
***
Janet Kira Lessin, author of “Polyamory, The Poly-Tantra Lovestyle”, moderates
the panel “How We Do Poly” at the Harbin Polyamory & Tantra Conference July
29-31. See http://www.worldpolyamoryassociation.com/
–
Janet Kira Lessin
1371 Malaihi Road, Maui, Hawaii 96793
janetlessin@gmail.com, janetlessin@aol.com
School of Tantra: www.schooloftantra.com, schooloftantra@aol.com
Temple of Tantra: www.templeoftantra.org, templeoftantra@gmail.com
Sacred Matrix: www.sacredmatrix.com, www.meetup.com/sacred-matrix,
www.sacredmatrix.ning
REPEAL DEFENSE OF MARRIAGE ACT 4 ALL MARRIAGES Sen. Leahy
REPEAL DEFENSE OF MARRIAGE ACT 4 ALL MARRIAGES Sen. Leahy The right to marry has completed my life with Marcelle for 48 years, and I’m Unfortunately, the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) interferes with the full Treating some Americans in state-sanctioned marriages as second-class citizens Now is the time to act. Last month Attorney General Eric Holder announced that the Justice Department I applaud President Obama and the Attorney General for reaching this decision, But DOMA remains the law of the land, and House Republicans want to force the Equal treatment under the law is a core American value. But because of DOMA, The Justice Department’s recent announcement puts us on the path towards fixing We cannot let this opportunity slip away. Thank you for taking action to fight for marriage equality. Sincerely, Patrick Leahy
proud that Vermont’s legislature was the first in the nation to grant that same
right to same-sex couples in 2009. Loving, committed relationships ought to be
encouraged — and they certainly should not be abridged by the federal
government.
marriage rights several states have recently provided to same-sex couples,
denying some families equal treatment under federal law.
betrays our values, and it must end. That’s why Senator Dianne Feinstein and I
are introducing the Respect for Marriage Act to repeal DOMA and recognize these
committed relationships at the federal level — and I hope you’ll stand with us.
will no longer defend the constitutionality of DOMA in court on the grounds that
it denies married same-sex couples equal protection under the law.
which marks a significant step in the right direction.
government to defend it. It’s up to us to repeal it once and for all.
legally-recognized same-sex couples still cannot file a federal tax return,
receive spousal Social Security benefits, or take time off when their spouse or
children fall ill — among other benefits and privileges the federal government
typically grants to married couples.
this injustice, giving our cause the momentum we need to pass the Respect for
Marriage Act and assure all married couples equal treatment under federal law.
U.S. Senator
